Thursday, January 10, 2013

Lessons

I feel like the universe is trying to teach me a lesson.

In the past when I've seen things going south on a project I have moved into Hyper-Meg Mode. Trying to stop the train before it crashed - and usually getting run over in the process.

On a recent project I was told repeatedly it was not my role to try to stop the train. I could tell the conductor things were about to hit the skids, but I was needed more on another track.

Sure enough the train is crashing and I feel this frustration. I also feel this desire to jump in and try to help the survivors. Yet I also see that it still isn't my part to play.  

So what is the universe trying to teach me?

That I should always take control so the train doesn't crash?

That I need to realize that not everything is mine to own? Maybe to learn to be okay with the small things so that I am okay with the really big things I can't control either?

I feel it is important to learn this lesson before I can move forward. I just am not sure what it is. I thought about putting it into the context of the job I want to have (Writer - Novel or Screenplay).

On the one hand writing fiction is the ultimate control - you create a world and the characters - and then you mess up their lives or make them better - maybe both.

At some point though you send your created world into the real one - and you're control begins to fade. You're told to change things, people see things differently than you intended. They own it in their own way.

So friends what is the lesson?

Monday, January 7, 2013

Almost There!

Finished the second draft of the screenplay! I just have a few things to check and then I'm ready to move it on out.

Sure I say that part so easily, but I haven't really got an idea of how it's all gonna work, but somehow I know it will. I don't know why I should be so filled with wild optimism, but sometimes you just feel like it's all going to work.

If I hadn't mentioned it yet - the story is all about pain. I know it sounds really cheerful right... well no, it's not. I'm not all kittens and sarcasm.

I feel like I have been through so much pain in my life, and that all of those experiences have allowed me to write about it. Although the story is different than the pain I've been through, it allowed me to know what my characters would feel like. At least I hope so.